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Meet Bob the Editor and the Stuffed Olives!sun

A LITTLE SERIOUS A LITTLE HUMOROUS

Bob the editor Christmasstuffed olives under the mistletoe

Happy New Year

Bob and all at the Olive Press would like to wish all our readers, contributors and advertisers A Very Merry Christmas & A Very Prosperous New Year plus a big thank you for all your support during 2011

What is the favourite food of elves?
Answer: "Elf"-aghetti!
How did elves climbed up to the top of Santa's Castle?
Answer: Using an "Elf"-evator.
Elves use what kind of money?
Answer: Jingle bills!
What's the first thing learnt by elves in school?
Answer: The "elf"-abet!
What would you call the twelfth elf that comes to help other 11 elves in the workshop? Answer: The twelf
Who makes toys and rides around in a pumpkin and lives at the North Pole?
Answer: Cinder-"elf"-a!
Santa rides in a sleigh. What do elves ride in?
Answer: Mini vans!
What do you call an elf that tells silly jokes?
Answer: A real Christmas card!
Where do you find elves?
Answer: Depends where you left them!
What would you call an elf who just has won the lottery?
Answer: Welfy
Where would a reindeer go to find her lost tail?
Answer: "Re-tail" store.
Which reindeer has the cleanest antlers?
Answer: Comet!
Who is very rude?
Answer: "Rude"-olph
How does Rudolph know when Christmas is coming?
Answer: He looks at his calen-"deer"!
What is the profession of snowmen?
Answer: Playing with angels.
What did the reindeer say when he saw an elf?
Answer: Nothing, reindeer can't talk.
Which elf was the best singer?
Answer: ELFis Presley.
Elves make sandwiches with what type of bread?
Answer: shortbread of course!
In Texas a wild elf is known as -
Answer: Gnome on the range!
How long should an elf's legs be?
Answer: Just long enough to reach the ground!
What do elves sing to Santa?
Answer: Freeze a Jolly Good Fellow!
Why the turkey was asked to join the band by elves?
Answer: Because he had the drum sticks!

sun

snowball

The Olive Press has quickly become a favourite for both readers & advertisers. Its light-hearted approach and unconventional format makes this magazine a refreshing change. It is widely regarded as the funniest magazine in Catalunya.

Have a laugh with our humorous stories; learn something new from the great variety of articles covering subjects like legal and practical advice, veterinary advice, health and alternative medicine, gastronomy and recipes, gardening, PC tips, and horoscopes; exercise your brain with our crossword & puzzles; where to go and what´s on, plus find that business or classified. We also support various animal shelters & charities. All this makes readers collect and keep the magazine for future reference.

The free monthly magazine for Catalunya and Costa Azahar especially for readers who enjoy a bit of humour, published in a handy A5 size that easily fits into your pocket or handbag. Produced in full colour on high quality glossy paper and distributed in popular outlets FROM TARRAGONA ALONG THE COAST WEST TO COSTA AZAHAR AND INLAND TOWARDS MORA, FLIX AND GANDESA.

Please advise us if you can not find one in your area.

Welcome to the December / January issue covering Catalunya. We would like to thank all our readers, advertisers and contributors for their 3 years of support as we now on our 4th year and 44th issue.

 

 

If you are unable to pick up a magazine from your normal distribution point because they have run out please let us know so we can top them up.
Looking for a business then visit our business directory online.

_______________________________________

IF YOU HAVE A CLOCKWORK INTERNET CONNECTION YOU CAN READ THIS MONTHS ARTICLES FROM THE LINKS ON THE RIGHT OR TO VIEW THE ENTIRE MAGAZINE CLICK ON THE IMAGE BELOW:

Click to open in a full page and then click again on the magazine to zoom in.

 

We are glad to see people are visiting our web site regularly. Please check the classified and business directory pages as these are updated as and when during the month. Plus some items are actually sold before the magazine goes to print!
Some event schedules do not appear before the magazine goes to press but as they become available we will publish them on our web site. There is also additional subjects and information about living in spain on the web site.
We would appreciate if anyone knows of extra distribution points to please let us know.

If you have trouble viewing this web site in Internet explorer then try a new browser. Mozilla firefox is similar to use, free and more secure.mozilla

PLEASE CLICK HERE FOR THE DISTRIBUTION SITES TO DATE, MORE ARE BEING ADDED EVERY MONTH.

 

INFORMATION ON THE FRONT COVER PICTURE

COVER PICTURE: "Rudolph the Reindeer."


The aim of the magazine is to provide readers with various articles some serious some humorous so that there is something of interest for everyone. We have found since moving here from the South of Spain that there is a lack of places to promote and advertise any business you may have. We are therefore offering this magazine as a solution.

We welcome any suggestions of what you would like to see in the magazine as well as distribution areas we may have missed. Any articles of local interest or details of upcoming events can be submitted.

CLICK THE COVER OF THE PAST ISSUES TO VIEW:

June 2009 issue 14

junee 09 magazine

May 2009 issue 13

May mag

April 2009 issue 12

april

Jan 2009 issue 9

jan issue

arca PLEASE COME AND SUPPORT US. Many thanks.Call Maeve 678 975 816

IT IS NOT A MIRACLE BUT IT SEEMS LIKE ONE.
Carmen and Anna of ARCA animal refuge have driven to Carrefour every day apart from Sundays to buy water to clean the kennels and water for the dogs for TWO AND A HALF years ,now after all that time they finally have the water and electricity connected, Carmen once said to me Mave it will never happen, they are so happy, it is wonderful to see them so excited about it, this was made possible by Matthew and Debbie of The Olive Press, they persevered and found the right organisation to make this happen. Carmen and Anna cannot thank them enough,they also want to thank Lesley and John Cottingham for donating an automatic washing machine,and Doreens husband Peter Gallaway for doing all the plumbing and donating the sink and kitchen units, a Spanish couple have donated a new water heater, so now when the vets return from Holland to do the next spay and neutering project they will be very happy to find the conditions for them to work in so much better. Once again many many thanks to Matthew and Debbie. OH. by the way, after telling a gentleman about this at the Bar Estacion , he asked if he adopted 6 or more dogs from ARCA, could Matthew and Debbie get the electricity and water on at his finca in the campo. now THAT WOULD BE A MIRACLE.
Thanks, Mave and all from ARCA
Sharpei

 

 

 

"moral and cultural progress of a country is measured from its treatment of animals"
(Mahatma Gandhi)

 

 

dinarumba

storsarai

puppiespuppies

risisartemis-english-setter-2-years

Scott

 

 

 

foxiScott

pegiFranky-2-years-maleBob

 

homing

sultanBOB 6 MONTHS OLD Sultan & Bob have found a home

JackyJacky has found a home

hominghomeBlue & Kiara have found homes

 

 

URGENT ADOPTION REQUIRED CALLED ARCA TODAY

A.R.C.A. (Association for Refuge and Taking care of the Animals) it is a non-profit association operating since the summer of year 2001. It is dedicated to protect and to defend the abandoned animals.

They are a small number of volunteers who try to protect the well-being of the dogs and look after them until they can find a home for them.

They try to make sure that they are adopted and they obtain the best possible home.

Also they want to make people more responsible for the animals so that the quantity of abandonments is reduced. They also micro chip the dogs and sterilize them .

At this moment they have 300 left dogs.

They are in Tortosa in the province of Tarragona (Spain). But it does not matter where they come from nor the distance as the dogs need aid and the best aid is that they have shelter and food.

All the material aid comes from the donations, thanks to them we can survive but with each new arrival the more donations are needed. If you want  to donate to Arca  if only by 5 € each month, minimum, please send an e-mail with your personal data and account number or call or write. Or just become a volunteer to help with the dogs.

email: protectora.arca@wanadoo.es

  ARCA, Post office 496, Tortosa, (Tarragona)

  or   contact:

  Maeve (English) 678 975 816

Cinta    625 915 605

Carmen 655 040 359

AMPARE

A. M. P. A. R. E.

The society for the protection of animals Ebro region. Based in Mora La Nova. We desperately need to re-home dogs to make room for more! We have over 200 dogs for adoption.

Susan 689 468752 English Isabel 977 404720 Spanish/ Catalan Donations always appreciated.

NOW HOMED-These two puppies have been abandoned in the last two weeks. The one on the right is a female and the fluffy one is a male. They are about nine weeks old and will be quite big dogs. Unfortunately, due to their size, if homes are not found in the next few weeks they are likely to be with us for life! They are very friendly and used to people and are wormed and vaccinated. It's not their fault their mum's owner was irresponsible! Please help them.

If you are interested in these or any other dog please phone:

Wendy 637 981 158 English

Isabel 977 404720 Spanish/ Catalan

Donations always appreciated.

 

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DISTRIBUTION SITES

COMING SOON TO BARCELONA AND SITGES

DISTRIBUTION POINTS

Please note these are the major spots and can vary plus some are seasonal.

TARRAGONA

SAN CARLOS DE LA RAPITA

TORTOSA

L'AMPOLLA

EL PERELLÓ

L'AMETLLA DE MAR

TRES CALAS URBANISATION

SANT JORDI D'ALFAMA

CALAFAT

 

L'HOSPITALET DE L'INFANT

MIAMI PLAYA

VANDALLOS

MONT ROIG

CAMBRILS

SALOU

NOTE many places below are only open in the Summer months so delivery in the Winter months will be restricted.

 

RASQUERA

FLIX

RIBA ROJA D'EBRE

MORA LA NOVA

MORA D'EBRE

GINESTAR

GANDESA

BENIFALLET


TIVENYS

XERTA

 

BITEM

FREGINALS

ULLDECONA AREA

ULLDECONA

VINARÒS

 

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Disclaimer: No part of this web site or publication may be reproduced by any means without prior permission in writing from the publisher. The Olive Press does not accept responsibility for the contents of the articles supplied by contributors nor for the claims made by advertisers. No adverts or artwork in the Olive Press Catalunya magazine or web site may be reproduced or used for print, media or web in part or in their entirety without the express permission of the Olive Press Catalunya. Adverts and logos remain the property of the magazine . To use any artwork please contact us.